# You Know It's REALLY Cold When....



## RoxyBlue

I'll start this one in honor of our frozen Forum friends


You know it's REALLY cold when......


...you have to wipe icicles off your nose after a walk.


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## Sickie Ickie

You see ice crystals in the air around you.


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## Otaku

...you can spit in the air and it freezes before it hits the sidewalk. Happened to me when I lived in Indiana.


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## Frighteners Entertainment

When you fart and it freezes to your pants.
I didn't happen to me but Otaku might fess up to it? LMAO


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## Bone Dancer

When your walking on packed snow it sounds like styrofoam.


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## Sickie Ickie

you can walk ON TOP of the snow!


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## RoxyBlue

You go to start your car and it makes the same sounds your eighty-years-plus old father makes when he gets up out of bed in the morning.


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## slightlymad

The dog refuses to go outside


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## Bone Dancer

When you go outside and your face feels like you have a bad sunburn.


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## Draik41895

when you can break your hair by touching it


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## Sickie Ickie

When your freshly washed hair turns to ice when walking from your door to your vehicle.


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## Black Cat

When your wearing 3 layers of clothes, gloves & a hat inside the house after waking up to no heat.


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## rottincorps

I had to were a sweat shirt to go out side its 57 in so. Ca........


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## Spooky1

When shifting gears with the stick shift of the car, it feels like it's in freshly poured cement.


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## Spooky1

When the Chesapeake bay freezes over.


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## Draik41895

Spooky1 said:


> When the Chesapeake bay freezes over.


when hell freezes over


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## Draik41895




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## slightlymad

Spooky1 said:


> When the Chesapeake bay freezes over.


Woo I gotta go for a ride


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## RoxyBlue

...you take a breath and the inside of your nose gets all pinched together.


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## RoxyBlue

...you put on so many layers of clothes before going out that you look like Ralphie's little brother Randy in "A Christmas Story" ("I can't move my arms!").


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## Sickie Ickie

...Your contacts ice up.


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## RoxyBlue

Sickie Ickie said:


> ...Your contacts ice up.


Now THAT's cold!


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## Haunted Bayou

Instead of sitting _on_ the toilet seat, you sit on your hands!


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## Sickie Ickie

RoxyBlue said:


> Now THAT's cold!


yep. Met two people this year whom this happened to. The 2nd guy had to walk inside and then called his doctor afterwards. His doc said that it was a good thing that only that part was affected, because the cornea was the only tissue that can be frozen without severe damage since they do that for transplants.

He now wears non prescription glasses because when the wind hits his eyes they hurt.


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## Don Givens

The turkey President Bush pardoned for Thanksgiving stuffed himself with chilli peppers and jumped in the turkey fryer.


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## RoxyBlue

The mercury won't come out of the bulb (for those of you who still have mecury thermometers).


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## Don Givens

Scientists discover two rings of ice crystals encircling Uranus.


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## RoxyBlue

Your face gets so stiff when you go outside that speaking becomes a real challenge.


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## Don Givens

You see a mummy wearing ear muffs.


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## Don Givens

You see the devil chopping fire wood


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## Don Givens

You hear a vampire say "I vant to drink your hot chocolate".


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## Monk

Your urine freezes...while still in your bladder.


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## rottincorps

.....the whisky doesn't worm you up


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## slightlymad

......you work outside and your coffee freezes


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## rottincorps

the penguins are wearing sweaters


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## Spooky1

...you take the dog for a walk and you don't see a single soul outside the whole time you're outside. (Either it's really cold or you're in an episode of the Twilight Zone and everyone else has vanished)


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## RoxyBlue

...huskies don't want to go outside.


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## The Bloodshed Brothers

When it feels like a witches tit in a snowmans mouth.

...that had a little halloween essence to it lol


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## Don Givens

You let your dog go outside and he comes back in with nose-cicles.


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## Spooky1

.. when you're out walking the dog, the people driving by in cars are pointing at you and laughing.


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## RoxyBlue

...you long for the days when you had an indoor cat and didn't have to go out to walk the dog.


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## Monk

... you step outside and your fingernails peel back.


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## RoxyBlue

....polar bears move in next door.


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## Bone Dancer

If it gets above 15 degrees, its a nice day.


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## Don Givens

You see your new neighbor, Mrs. Polar Bear, buying an electric blanket at Walmart.


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## Frighteners Entertainment

When there is ice on your outlets (true story here)


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## Draik41895

when your tongue freezes before it touches the pole


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## RoxyBlue

...it's easier and quicker to ski to work rather than drive.


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## scareme

...your goosebumps get goosebumps.


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## RoxyBlue

...the icicles that form in January are still there in May.


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## scareme

My puppy brings icicles in the house, he thinks they are like sticks. Then he leaves them on the floor, and they melt.


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## PrettyGhoul

scareme said:


> My puppy brings icicles in the house, he thinks they are like sticks. Then he leaves them on the floor, and they melt.


lol sounds like a cute puppy! 

...when you wear wool socks to bed and you live in Florida.


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## Eldritch_Horror

...when your pet Husky doesn't goof off and sniff around when you take him out to the bathroom.


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## Lady Nyxie

RoxyBlue said:


> ...you put on so many layers of clothes before going out that you look like Ralphie's little brother Randy in "A Christmas Story" ("I can't move my arms!").


Well, put 'em down when you get to work.


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## Lady Nyxie

... when you contemplate letting the dog poop in the house on the linoleum cause cleaning it up can't possibly be as bad as going out in THAT cold weather.


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## RoxyBlue

Lady Nyxie said:


> Well, put 'em down when you get to work.


LOL!

I love that movie


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## Lady Nyxie

... you stay inside the house all day, shades drawn, with every light in the house on (to simulate sunshine) and blast Beach Boys songs hoping that you will forget how cold it really is outside and how long it is until summer comes back.


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## Lady Nyxie

In honor of the upcoming Ground Hog's Day.

... when Punxatawney Phil refuses to come out of his burrow to predict whether there will be 6 more weeks of winter saying that it is too cold for that crap.


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## RoxyBlue

...when the Polar Bear people say it's too cold to go into the water.


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## Spooky1

... when the weather man uses the term Ice Age in his forecast.


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## Spooky1

...when the car finally warms up, just as I'm pulling into the parking lot at work.


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## RoxyBlue

...your mailbox freezes shut.


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## Draik41895

you sneez and you snot breaks when it hits your hands


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## Draik41895

your dog tries to pee and freezes to the hydrant


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## Draik41895

every ones fingers are to frostbite resulting in very few posts in this thread for quite some time


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## Monk

you spend your time describing how cold it is.


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## The Creepster

the police show up cause you made a ice arena on your street which resulted in a 20 car pile up and several deaths:googly:


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## Jack Reaper

......you call a friend in Florida and they start to freeze...


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## RoxyBlue

...leaves shatter when they fall from trees


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## The Creepster

The Creepster offers a free test run in his Crematorium:devil:


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## Jack Reaper

The Creepster said:


> The Creepster offers a free test run in his Crematorium:devil:


....and we look forward to it...


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## DeadDudeintheHouse

You Know It's REALLY Cold When.... 

a penguin walks by and asks you if you need a blanket.


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## morbidmike

when your eyes bleed red ICE (tears of happiness)


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## Moon Dog

You know it's really cold when...

You step into the freezer just to thaw out.


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## The Creepster

when the corpse in the yard stop decomposing and you tell the neighbors "No its just a prop" but they call the cops anyways


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## morbidmike

when outter extremitys turn black and fall off like a lepper


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## The Creepster

When you have to use your new shovel cause the old one broke on the frozen ground...or someones head...which ever comes first.... I forget


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## morbidmike

When the abominalsnoman (never spelled that before)makes you his love slave so he can stay warm


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## The Creepster

when you cut the neighbors trees down for firewood


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## RoxyBlue

...you cut the neighbor's HOUSE down for firewood


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## The Creepster

Roxy you and I are eventually going to share a cell.....
and when your eyebrows are sweaty and freeze


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## morbidmike

Hey it's colder than hell in here who cut my F...ing house down


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## Zombies R Us

When you are elated to hear that -30 Celsius is the projected temperature for the week. (this is a good day where I come from).


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## morbidmike

when you speek and the words freeze in mid air


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## rottincorps

when you want your wife to put her cold feet on you .......to worm up


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## The Creepster

when your dog ask to use the toilet


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## Jack Reaper

When you try to start your car and it actually talks,
"Idontwannaidontwannaidontwanna....uh-uh...uh-uh......Nonononononononononononono..."


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## RoxyBlue

...the mercury won't come out of the bulb


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## Rahnefan

...instead of trimming your nose hair, you just pinch & blow.


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## Hungryforblood

You just live in the Midwest


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## Wildcat

When it takes 5 miles of driving to get the tires warm enough to get rid of the flat spots. (Happened last year twice.)


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## Jack Reaper

......when Eskimos look at you like you are crazy for being out and about


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## debbie5

The dog walks out on the deck & then turns around and comes right back in with a look that sez, "I'll pee later when it warms up out there!"


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## The Creepster

you use the hot tub and the soles of your feet get stuck to the concrete after wards....silly relatives


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## morbidmike

when the sun gets stuck trying to rise due to a ice storm


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## debbie5

You are out of freezer space, so you just store the cupcakes in the car overnight.


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## morbidmike

when your car wont start cause the oil turned to ice cubes (truck)


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## The Creepster

when not even running the oxy torch makes you warm and fuzzy


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## morbidmike

when you point your finger at some one and it turns black and falls off


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## The Archivist

After watching the movie "The Day After Tommorow", you look outside the window and you wonder if the movie is still playing...

U typ n cl fn spk Bcuz fngrs 2 cld...


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## debbie5

You need to run a portable heater in the bathroom before you even consider getting in the shower.


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## Haunted Bayou

In the south you know it is really cold when you can ice skate on the lake at LSU.
Yes, that actually happened ONCE!


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## Lady Nyxie

Your fish hibernates. (true story)


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## morbidmike

when your furnace run's all the time but your fridge dosent


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## The Creepster

your tongue sticks to your drink


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## Night Watchman

your snot freezes to your upper lip.


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## Lady Nyxie

... you can't feel your fingertips when you are typing.


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## Night Watchman

you can't get out your front door because it is frozen shut.


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## debbie5

..even the mice are looking for a nice wool sock...(LOL)...


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## The Creepster

Old man winter ask's to borrow a oat


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## RoxyBlue

You light a candle to take outside and the flame freezes solid.


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## debbie5

....you can feel the condensation freeze on your nostril hairs.


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## morbidmike

when you live in colorado and get 2 ft of snow for halloween hahahahahahahaha


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## The Bloodshed Brothers

its below freezing outside


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## morbidmike

when you sweat ice cubes


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## Lady Nyxie

... when the dog would rather potty in the house than go outside.


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## RoxyBlue

...when you let the dog go potty in the house because you don't want to go outside either.


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## Lady Nyxie

... when you would rather snuggle by the fire on Halloween night than participate in TOT.


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## debbie5

...when I put socks on.


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## The Creepster

Hey wheres my socks?

When you can curl your kitty-cats on the driveway


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## Lady Nyxie

... your fingers are numb at work (inside the building). True story.


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## Lady Nyxie

... you wear a ski hat and quilted flannel... inside the house.


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## Kaoru

When your water pipes crack


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## ScreamingScarecrow

When you leave your fridge open to warm up the place!


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## morbidmike

when your ice cubes get frost bit


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## Lady Nyxie

... you contemplate the consequences of possibly being fired from your job because it is too cold to leave the house to go to work.


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## morbidmike

when you goose bumps have goose bumps


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## Lady Nyxie

... when the ducks freeze in the pond.


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## Haunted Bayou

...when your Siberian Husky sticks his nose out the door then decides to stay in.


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## RoxyBlue

...you can use your car as extra refrigerator space during the winter holidays


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## Lady Nyxie

... the polar bears at the zoo ask to stay inside for recess.


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## Wildcat

when nitrogen from the atmosphere pools on the ground.


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## Lady Nyxie

... when the penguins want to snuggle up with the polar bears in the warm building.


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## RoxyBlue

....your cup of piping hot coffee turns into iced coffee two seconds after you leave the coffee shop


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## fick209

...when you have to put on a stocking cap, scarf, parka, snowpants, and insulated snow boots just to wheel garbage can out to street curb on garbage day.


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## Lady Nyxie

fick209 said:


> ...when you have to put on a stocking cap, scarf, parka, snowpants, and insulated snow boots just to wheel garbage can out to street curb on garbage day.


... when you have to wear all of that to sit inside of your "heated" house.


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## fick209

When you start you vehicle and let it "warm up" for 20 min with heater on high and you still have to wear stocking hat and gloves to drive to work.


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## RoxyBlue

You turn on your kitchen faucet and ice cubes come out


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## Lady Nyxie

... the weatherman comes on and simply says, "Ah, hell, it's just damn cold out there."


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## Lady Nyxie

... you hear someone say, "It's colder than a witches *** in one of debbie5's brass bras."


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## Night Watchman

...your car comes with block heater that you have to plug in at night to keep the engine warm.


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## bourno

....when you can see the breath of the people on TV


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## fick209

When an entire lake freezes over in one night
(its actually quite beautiful, froze perfectly smooth, looks like glass)


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## The Archivist

When you're watching ice skating on tv and your heater kicks on.


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## Lady Nyxie

... when a guest at your home suggests making extra money by using your living room as a skating rink.


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## fick209

...when you go to the bathroom to relieve yourself and you become frozen to the throne.


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## haunted canuck

when you have actually expirenced -50 its either -50 celcius or -50 ferenheit they meet at that point I have and thats cold, it does for weeks at a time reach the -30 celcius where I am from so reading this list most of them are true and most of them I have seen or have expierenced


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## fick209

when both fireplaces are going, furnace is running nonstop and you can't reach 68 deg F in the house.


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## RoxyBlue

....you can keep your snowman inside all winter and he doesn't melt


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## haunted canuck

your aquarium is now a frozen sushi dinner


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## fick209

...your dog has only got outside twice in the last 11 hours.


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## RoxyBlue

...you can only take two steps out of the house before freezing to the pavement


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## haunted canuck

its currently -29 or for you -20 in Edmonton today so thats cold


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## fick209

...the lunch you forgot in your vehicle this morning froze.


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## RoxyBlue

...you sneeze and ice cubes come out of your nose


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## haunted canuck

when you hit a pot hole and your tires shatter because the rubber has frozen


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## nixie

My hubby picked up ice-cream for our son's B-day party, left it in his car the entire time he was at work, and it was fine.


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## haunted canuck

when you just put your beer outside to get cold faster than your fridge, by the way -32 celcius right now in Edmonton


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## RoxyBlue

...you freeze to your toilet


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## nixie

The kids say it's too cold to go sledding


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## RoxyBlue

...sled dogs say it's too cold to go sledding


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## fick209

..when forcast is calling for 10 above today and you consider that a pretty nice day.


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## Lady Nyxie

... when people on the forum who are from MN start talking about ice surfing.


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## RoxyBlue

...Canadian Forum members can't log in because their fingers are frozen stiff


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## haunted canuck

canadian members can log on and can say it has warmed up to -20 celcius


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## debbie5

snotsicles...


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## Lady Nyxie

... the snot inside your nose doesn't even get to come out far enough to become a snotsicle.


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## fick209

...1/2 the employees were late for work this morning because they forgot to plug in vehicle's block heater.


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## fick209

You know it's really cold when this is what 1 of the exterior doors at my house looks like:


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## RoxyBlue

(That's scary, fick)

....all the mail in your mailbox is stuck together and you have to thaw it in the microwave oven


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## fick209

...lawyers have their hands in their own pockets


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## RoxyBlue

fick209 said:


> ...lawyers have their hands in their own pockets


LOL, I rank this as one of the 10 best examples:jol::googly:


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## haunted canuck

when you go ice fishing and as soon as you finish drilling the hole it soon has a crusty layer of ice on top of it , yes we Canucks fish on the ice when it freezes


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## The Pod

You leave the door to your freezer in the garage open to heat the garage.


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## The Creepster

When your newspaper is stuck to the side of your vehicle


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## Spooky1

Your dog that's part Husky won't stay outside long.


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## fick209

...your dog refused to go outside without his booties on


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## haunted canuck

when you blink your eyes almost freeze shut, it can happen currently -32 with the windchill


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## haunted canuck

today with the windchill its -40 in Edmonton thats either celcius or farenheit most thermometers only go to - 40 you know its cold when its at that point


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## RoxyBlue

..the only topic of conversation is about how cold it is.


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## fick209

...18 gallons of gas lasted 4 days & only 155 miles


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## Spooky1

... everyone starts producing extra CO2 just to help global warming along.


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## Spooky1

... people start burning Al Gores book to stay warm.


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## RoxyBlue

..by the time you get to work, you can't get out of your car because the doors are frozen shut.


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## fick209

RoxyBlue said:


> ..by the time you get to work, you can't get out of your car because the doors are frozen shut.


That happened to me last friday, went through carwash on way home from work, pulled into garage and all doors & windows froze. Thank goodness for heated garage, only took a minute to unthaw and get out:googly:

...people are roasting chestnuts over an open fire to put in their clothing to stay warm.


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## haunted canuck

i dare you to try and wash your car up north, itll freeze the minute you get it out of the wash, however you may have to most of the car washes are heated but once you leave a different story I once had to wash my car and left it outside parked it and went into the store buy the time i got back to my car maybe 10 minutes the water on the tires was frozen to the pavement , it almost did not want to move when I put it into gear, if any longer in the store it may have actually frozen solid to the ground warming up currently
-26 celcius


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## Wildcat

when you bottom out the thermometer on the overhead console. Mine bottoms out at -45C and it did it 4 times last year (that I noticed).


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## RoxyBlue

Wildcat said:


> when you bottom out the thermometer on the overhead console. Mine bottoms out at -45C and it did it 4 times last year (that I noticed).


And that's why no one messes with Canada - it's just too COLD up there!:googly:


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## debbie5

That's why I married a Frenchie/Canuck..they know how to keep warm all winter!! (and have high Fall birth rates?)


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## RoxyBlue

...your fluffy thick coated dog is curled up closer to you on the bed than your spouse at night


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## fick209

..when your dog no longer bothers to curl up on the bed but insead crawls under all the covers to sleep at night.


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## haunted canuck

our town recorded a temperature of -58.4 with the wind chill on December 13 colder than the Arctic circle that day


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## RoxyBlue

...shooting stars DON'T burn up in the atmosphere


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## The Creepster

you go outside and spray cfc's into the air


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## fick209

...when gas furnace won't run because regulator on outside of house is froze


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## The Creepster

when your qb is stiff and slow out of the pocket....oh wait unless its Brett


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## haunted canuck

when you toss a quarter into the air and catch it for heads and tails and it travels in the air and when it hits your skin it almost adhears to your skin , like tongue on a pole


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## nixie

Frosty the Snowman decides he would rather melt, and goes inside.


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## The Creepster

you realize that back hair is a good thing


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## RoxyBlue

...your car key freezes in the ignition


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## fick209

...when wool socks and long underwear are the staples of your wardrobe


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## morbidmike

when beer freezes in your belly


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## nixie

when all of my pets are sleeping in front of a register


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## morbidmike

when you cry ice cubes


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## scareme

when you eyelashes freeze together as you're crying ice cubes.


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## morbidmike

when penguines huddle around the hobo campfire in a 55 gallon drum


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## haunted canuck

true story.. your skiboot shatters walking up a set of metal stairs, I was working at a ski hill one year and while waking up some stairs my plastic ski boot broke off at the bottom , it was about -25 that day i think


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## morbidmike

when your snot bubbles freeze


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## RoxyBlue

...the leaves on your trees shatter when they fall


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## morbidmike

when Roxy goes outside in her bathing suit


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## The Creepster

when you live in Minnesota


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## RoxyBlue

morbid mike said:


> when Roxy goes outside in her bathing suit


No, that would be a sign of the Apocalypse

...you slam the front door and your vinyl siding breaks into pieces


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## The Creepster

The sun is a snowball


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## morbidmike

when the campfire freezes


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## RoxyBlue

...the water in the dog's bowl freezes, and it's in your kitchen


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## morbidmike

.....when my wife wants to cuddle with me


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## nixie

When my mom got mad at me for walking with the kids "all the way" to her house "in this weather" and she lives four houses up the street.


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## morbidmike

when the bear traps in the front yard are froze open


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## fick209

The Creepster said:


> when you live in Minnesota


Hey we made it to 6 whole degrees yesterday, didn't even have to wear a coat:googly:

...when I decide to quit smoking, not for my health, it's just too damn cold to stand outside anymore.


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## The Creepster

When your lungs freeze from lack of smoke


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## scareme

It doesn't seem cold to me, but then I'm having a hot flash right now.


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## RoxyBlue

...your hot coffee turns to iced coffee between the time you pour it into your cup and the moment you take the first sip


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## fick209

...
60 above zero: Floridians turn on the heat. Minnesotans plant gardens.
50 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably. People are sunbathing in Duluth.
40 above zero: Import cars won’t start. Minnesotans drive with the sunroof open.
32 above zero: Distilled water freezes. The water in Bemidji gets thicker.
20 above zero: People in Arizona don long johns, parkas and wool hats & mittens. Minnesotans throw on a flannel shirt.
15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn on the heat. People in Minnesota have one last cookout before it gets cold.
Zero: People in Miami all die. Minnesotans close the windows.
10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. Minnesotans dig their winter coats out of storage.
25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. Girl Scouts in Minnesota still selling cookies door to door.
40 below zero: Washington, D.C. finally runs out of hot air. People in Minnesota let their dogs sleep indoors.
100 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Minnesotans get upset because the Mini-Van won’t start.
460 below zero: ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale). People in Minnesota can be heard to say, “Cold ’nuff fer ya?”
500 below zero: Hell freezes over. Minnesota public schools open 2 hours late.


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## The Creepster

Fick makes a criminally insane person cookies


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## nixie

fick- lmao!!!!


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## RoxyBlue

...you oversleep because the bell on your alarm clock froze overnight


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## fick209

...part of your job description now includes starting all the employees vehicles and letting them run for 10 minutes twice a day to ensure that they will start for them at the end of the day.


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## morbidmike

when you crack your knuclkes and your fingers fall off


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## fick209

morbid mike said:


> when you crack your knuclkes and your fingers fall off


LOL - that's a good one

...when people no longer give the finger, they give the mitten


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## nixie

My dog flips me off when I put her outside


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## morbidmike

when Nixie hasnt put her christmas decor away yet


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## fick209

...when the dog enters the house through dog door and it shatters


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## The Creepster

when key west hits a whopping 47 degrees


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## The Archivist

when Southern California witnesses historic levels of immigration from the other States.


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## nixie

When a nearby town throws an "ice festival"


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## The Creepster

When your maid wont get out of your hot tub


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## Zurgh

When your shadow refuses to leave the house with you.


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## The Creepster

When penguins are spotted of the coast of Brazil


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## RoxyBlue

...the water coming out of your cold water tap feels hot


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## The Creepster

Old man winter turns up the furnace


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## RoxyBlue

...Frosty the Snowman buys a summer home in Key West


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## The Creepster

when going hottubbing with the maid is not appealing


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## RoxyBlue

...the hot tub has icebergs


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## Moon Dog

when your heat pump freezes over and you have to wait till spring to try and use it again.


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## RoxyBlue

...people move to Minnesota because it's so warm there


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## Moon Dog

You see penguins moving to warmer climates


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## RoxyBlue

...air freezes solid


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## fick209

RoxyBlue said:


> ...people move to Minnesota because it's so warm there


WTF:googly:


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## fick209

...when you havent seen your neighbor for over a week


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## fick209

Moon Dog said:


> when your heat pump freezes over and you have to wait till spring to try and use it again.


geothermal or air to air?


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## Zurgh

you prepare to hibernate.


----------



## Moon Dog

its too cold to hibernate


----------



## Zurgh

you move your hibernating spot to Ecuador.


----------



## Moon Dog

hell freezes over


----------



## The Creepster

shampoo is frozen in the shower


----------



## Haunted Bayou

Your shower acts like freezing rain.


----------



## morbidmike

when your ice melter freezes in the bag


----------



## The Creepster

when your wife wants to snuggle ALL DAY Blah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## morbidmike

when you'd rater sit outside in the snow than come in and face your wife


----------



## The Creepster

the garage door wont open due to frozen hinges


----------



## The Archivist

when walking into a freezer, it feels warmer than going outside.


----------



## The Creepster

the metal pins in your joints break


----------



## Moon Dog

the metal plate in my head cracks


----------



## Jack Reaper

Icicles are shivering


----------



## The Creepster

When Northern Canada is referred to as a hot spot


----------



## PrettyGhoul

I turn _on_ the heat.


----------



## The Creepster

Florida is in a coat shortage crisis


----------



## RoxyBlue

...iguanas fall out of trees in Florida


----------



## The Creepster

The price of fruit goes through the roof


----------



## morbidmike

when a band of midgets cut you open to stay warm in your in testines


----------



## The Creepster

asbestosis underwear is a good thing


----------



## morbidmike

when a man can hang a coat hanger on his nipull's


----------



## The Creepster

Your skin is cracked and bleeding on your hands


----------



## The Archivist

When the old people start reminiscing when they were warm when they were young...


----------



## The Creepster

The fireplace becomes the center of your bed


----------



## The Archivist

You run out of clothing to layer up with.


----------



## Fiend4Halloween

when you chizzle off the brown spot on your frozen sheets, toss it in the fire...and it makes a fart sound!!


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## debbie5

...when you hang blankets on the doors (looking at back door...)


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## RoxyBlue

Fiend4Halloween said:


> when you chizzle off the brown spot on your frozen sheets, toss it in the fire...and it makes a fart sound!!


I'm ashamed to say I laughed out loud about that one:googly::jol:


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## The Creepster

When your frozen nose hair pokes a hole in you lip


----------



## morbidmike

when you have to keep kitty cats in your pant legs for warmth


----------



## GothicCandle

when you fall asleep to take a nap, and wake up and your eye lids are frozen shut.


----------



## The Archivist

When you get into a loud, active arguement with someone just to stay warm.


----------



## RoxyBlue

...your totally dry hair freezes within seconds of going outside


----------



## fick209

...you know it's cold when I admit it's cold (flipping MN winters)


----------



## Spooky1

The ground hogs shadow freezes and shatters.


----------



## The Creepster

you live next door to Fick...or Spooky and Roxy


----------



## RoxyBlue

The "columns" on your front porch are actually icicles


----------



## The Creepster

It feels so good to walk on red hot pokers


----------



## Evil Andrew

...you get snotcicles hanging from your moustache


----------



## fick209

...when you are excited about the temperature possibly reaching 20 degrees today


----------



## The Creepster

the trash can is frozen to the street


----------



## RoxyBlue

...there is still snow on the ground in August and you live in Florida


----------



## The Creepster

Debbie is out shoveling


----------



## fick209

...when a wearing a stocking cap at the dinner table is completely acceptable


----------



## STOLLOWEEN

when you are anticipating 35 degree weather so you can wear shorts outside


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## fick209

STOLLOWEEN said:


> when you are anticipating 35 degree weather so you can wear shorts outside


...not only can you wear shorts at that temp, you now think there's no need for a furance:googly:

Spring IS coming...I saw 2 robins in MN yestersay


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## STOLLOWEEN

lol at fick....

when you start thinking that you look really good in your winter hat


----------



## fick209

STOLLOWEEN said:


> lol at fick....
> 
> when you start thinking that you look really good in your winter hat


...when the winter hat is acceptable even at church


----------



## Evil Andrew

... when even the big dog doesn't want to go outside.


----------



## STOLLOWEEN

...when you are looking forward to the arrival of stinging insects


----------



## Dead Things

you slam the car door and the whole thing shatters


----------



## haunted canuck

Canadians actualy have to put on extra clothes


----------



## The Creepster

Canada loses a curling match


----------



## RoxyBlue

...The Creepster does not go for his morning 6 mile run


----------



## Goblin

When you spit and it freezes before it hits the ground


----------



## haunted canuck

when a slurpee headache doesnt bother you


----------



## jaege

haunted canuck said:


> when a slurpee headache doesnt bother you


(Now thats cold.)

snuggling with your favorite body doesn't help.


----------



## The Archivist

when you light yourself on fire just to thaw out your hands to get your house keys from your pocket.


----------



## Evil Andrew

when you car doors are frozen shut


----------



## STOLLOWEEN

When you order an Iced Cappuccino just to stay warm.


----------



## Goblin

When the mercury in the thermometer freezes


----------



## haunted canuck

Canadians feel a chill.


----------



## bourno

when snowmen come knocking on your door and want inside


----------



## morbidmike

when your blood turnes to a slushie


----------



## STOLLOWEEN

If you stop seeing your breath outside you think that something is wrong.


----------



## haunted canuck

you never have to use your freezer for your frozen foods


----------



## RoxyBlue

...you can ice skate on the Amazon River in the summer


----------



## The Archivist

...you believe that a trip to Hell would make for a nice vacation.


----------



## Evil Andrew

...It snows enough to cancel 2 Rockies games in May !!!


----------



## Goblin

It snows in the desert


----------



## fick209

...when I still have to wear a stocking hat & gloves in May to run the dog


----------



## Evil Andrew

....you have to start wearing the insulated gloves on your motorcycle


----------



## RoxyBlue

...your shadow sticks to an icy sidewalk


----------



## debbie5

..your breath freezes on your nostril hairs.


----------



## Evil Queen

...the dog won't actually sit with her behind on the cement.


----------



## trishaanne

...you take a bag of ice out of the freezer and put it in the sink and 3 hours later it still hasn't melted AT ALL!!! (really got to turn the heat up past 59 one of these days)


----------



## RoxyBlue

...food lasts longer in the trunk of your car parked outside than it does in your refrigerator


----------



## Spooky1

rubber balls break instead of bouncing.


----------



## Goblin

The thermometer comes inside to get warm


----------



## Evil Andrew

You make turtles jealous : )


----------



## RoxyBlue

...huskies have to wear parkas


----------



## debbie5

...EA combs his back hair up & over his ears to stay warm.


----------



## Goblin

Fire freezes


----------



## Evil Andrew

The homeless literally freeze to death : (

Colorado is no place to sleep outdoors in January.


----------



## Goblin

They call winter the new ice age


----------



## Haunted Spider

You throw water into the air and it freezes before hitting the ground.


----------



## RoxyBlue

....wooly mammoths show up in your backyard


----------



## Haunted Spider

Your wife decides to not shave and become a woolly mammoth to stay warm. It is 1 degree here


----------



## Goblin

You're frozen into suspended animation in your living room!


----------



## PrettyGhoul

...you're living in florida and you can skate on your pond.


----------



## Goblin

Arizona has freeze warnings


----------



## GrimmEverafter

...when you go outside with a hot drink/food item and it's ice cold in less than ten minutes.


----------



## Haunted Spider

you open your door to let your dog out and when you close it, you can see your breath inside for a brief moment. It was 0 out this morning. brrr...


----------



## Spooky1

... you get two inches of snow and there is still snow and ice on the neighborhood sidewalks weeks later.


----------



## Haunted Spider

The icecicles put on a sweater


----------



## Goblin

It's snowing in your living room


----------



## Haunted Spider

your pipes freeze with heat tape on them.


----------



## Goblin

The sun freezes


----------



## Haunted Spider

your key breaks as you try to turn it in the door.


----------



## Goblin

You don't need a freezer to make ice cubes


----------



## badger

I saw a chicken crossing the road with a capon...


----------



## Haunted Spider

The weather man refuses to do the story outside.


----------



## RoxyBlue

...the polar bear plunge gets cancelled


----------



## Haunted Spider

Penguins have taken residence on your lawn.


----------



## Goblin

You can go ice skating in the kitchen


----------



## Spooky1

You kiss your honey on Valentine's Day and your lips freeze together


----------



## Goblin

You experience a second ice age in your living room


----------



## Haunted Spider

You leave soda bottles on the floor to refrigerate. (my kitchen last week)


----------



## Goblin

It's snowing in your bedroom


----------



## autumnghost

Your boogers freeze and your nose crunches (courtesy of my son when he was about 6)


----------



## Dead Things

People in Saskatchewan say "it's cold"


----------



## Evil Queen

Your bucky asks for a blanket to put in his coffin.


----------



## Haunted Spider

Your tires are frozen to the driveway.


----------



## Goblin

You hit an iceberg driving to work and your car goes down with all hands!


----------



## scareme

A bird freezes at the bird bath.


----------



## Goblin

Fire freezes


----------



## Haunted Spider

You are able to make fire with ice.. (hey the mythbusters did it)


----------



## Goblin

Fog freezes into solid chunks


----------



## Haunted Spider

your glasses freeze to your face. 

Actually, we have a heat wave fo 50 degree weather right now.


----------



## Goblin

Birds freeze in mid flight


----------



## RoxyBlue

..it's colder in Winnipeg in Canada (-31C) than it is on the surface of Mars (-29C) (and it actually happened on New Year's Eve).


----------



## Goblin

The mercury in the thermoter is frozen


----------



## scareme

The pipes in the bathroom froze, and we had to call a plummer, again.


----------



## Hairazor

You fart snowflakes! (saw this one on facebook)


----------



## Evil Andrew

When you see a politician with his hands in his _own _pockets


----------



## Moon Dog

A snowman wants to come inside to warm up


----------



## RoxyBlue

...your car freezes to the driveway


----------



## Evil Andrew

.....your cat freezes to the driveway


----------



## scareme

You have to wear a hat, coat and mittens to bring in the mail.


----------



## Evil Andrew

you say the heck with it and move to Phoenix


----------



## Evil Elf

There's a bird frozen mid-flight.


----------



## Goblin

Hell has frozen over


----------



## RoxyBlue

...your eyelids freeze to your eyeballs


----------



## Goblin

Your words freeze and fall to the ground and shatter


----------



## RoxyBlue

...opening your refrigerator door actually makes the house warmer.


----------



## ghostgirl

when you ask your dog if she has to go out and she grabs your dirty socks off the floor and takes them to the door


----------



## Moon Dog

When Frosty the Snowman wants to come inside


----------



## RoxyBlue

...you can replace your window panes with sheets of ice and they don't melt even when the heat is on in the house.


----------



## RoxyBlue

...you start looking for a tauntaun's belly to crawl into


----------



## Moon Dog

...you fly South for the winter


----------



## RoxyBlue

..your dog's pee turns into icicles before it hits the ground


----------



## Zurgh

... old man winter comes into your home to warm up.


----------



## Pumpkin5

:jol:You sleep with clothes on.....


----------



## RoxyBlue

...a glacier forms in your yard when the sump pump runs


----------



## Bone To Pick

... your pets stop playing with socks and start wearing them.


----------



## Dreadmakr

Your breath freezes into ice particles, which fall to the ground when you exhale


----------



## Hairazor

You blow bubbles and they freeze


----------



## Dreadmakr

The flames in your fireplace are frozen in place


----------



## Goblin

When it's snowing in your attic


----------



## Hairazor

You need gloves under your gloves


----------



## Dreadmakr

You have to burn your Halloween props to keep from freezing.


----------



## Hairazor

Your eyeballs freeze


----------



## Goblin

Your words freeze in mid-air!


----------



## Hairazor

Bubbles freeze


----------



## Goblin

Even fire freezes! 🔥


----------



## Hairazor

Your dog won't go out to take care of business


----------



## Goblin

The sky's frozen


----------



## Hairazor

You sneeze and it freezes as it comes out


----------



## Goblin

Your earwax freezes


----------



## Hairazor

Ice cubes come out of your faucet


----------



## Goblin

Words freeze in mid-air


----------



## Hairazor

Your car windows crack


----------



## Goblin

Waterfalls freeze


----------



## Hairazor

All your extremities are blue


----------



## Dreadmakr

Even the ice cycles hanging off your house beg to come in to warm up a bit


----------



## RoxyBlue

….huskies start wearing parkas and snow boots


----------



## Hairazor

The smoke out of your chimney freezes


----------



## PrettyGhoul

I don't think I'm qualified to play this game, living in Florida; but I'll give it a try:

...you wished you owned a coat. (see... just doesn't seem right, tee hee)


----------



## Hairazor

Your lips stick together


----------



## PrettyGhoul

A true Floridian I now know, told me of how the creek I live near (which has alligators) froze when he was a kid in 1968 and he WALKED on it; lol. I've lived in Florida long enough to see it get below freezing (used to happen every year) and I've even seen snow but I have never seen ice strong enough to walk or skate on. It's also been over twenty years since I've seen cold weather at all. Sad but true. It scares me. This hasn't been normal for a long time.


----------



## RoxyBlue

…you burp and it freezes so solid the moment it comes out your mouth that you can actually pick it up and then leave it in a co-worker’s desk drawer as a surprise when it later thaws out


----------



## Hairazor

You can drop a raw egg on the sidewalk and it doesn't break cause it's frozen


----------



## The Haddonfield Slasher

You're golfing and shank one into the small lake... walk to the other side of the lake, and hit it off the ice back onto the fairway. 🤣 Yep, I did it last year.


----------



## Hairazor

Your bottle of deicer bursts in your car, yup happened to Sweetie


----------

