# But what about my little girl?



## Night Owl (Feb 28, 2008)

I have a seven year old girl, and as much as I want to go super scary with my yard this year, I'm afraid to scar the kid for life. I know I'm not the only one to ever deal with this issue, so I was hoping for some insight from the masters...

I will say that I'm totally proud of how well she does with my scary stuff hanging around the house. The child is a trooper, ya'll. At the same time, she seems a little scared when she's not _trying _to be so brave. Makes me wonder if I'm being a little selfish? By the way, my props are sometimes gross, but never bloody or overtly gory.

When I was a kid, facing the fear was ultimately a healthy thing... Am I just worried about nothing here? I'd appreciate your opinions.


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## Denhaunt (Aug 18, 2006)

I've got a 3 yr old little girl and I'm oftem worried about the same. I think that it's all about the involvemnt in the project. My little girtl knows my props as my "toys" and she seems to be okay with it. I think that overall judgement is the key But like you I still worry


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## HalloweenZombie (Jul 22, 2007)

I have two little girls. One is 5 and the other is 8. They don't mind my stuff at all. As a matter of fact, my 8 year old has requested a room of her own in the haunt this year. I let them see everything I make so that they know it is not real. I've even had them help me make some things. They are crazy about Halloween and the haunt. Just get your little girl involved and let her see how much fun it is.


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## Frighteners Entertainment (Jan 24, 2006)

Tough call. I will be worrying about this as my boy gets older.
Though, this is what i did to him as a newborn (born in Oct of last year)


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## Terrormaster (Sep 27, 2007)

It's really about their mentality and what's the norm for them. If they see scary props and stuff around them day in and out because that's what you're into then you have nothing to worry about. My daughter is turning six and she is totally in to Halloween, helps me pick out prop ideas sometime, etc. Most of it doesn't even phase her because she's seen skulls and monster toys all around my desk ever since she was born. I too involve her in my projects as my little helper and design critique.

-TM


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## joker (Sep 25, 2007)

My 7 year old absolutely loves Halloween, even over Christmas. He helps out quite a bit with props and even comes up with some pretty good ideas. A few times he's made suggestions and a month or so later I see where others are doing the exact same thing. 

Last year was our first walk through haunt and he hated our haunt because it took so much of my extra time, after letting him get involved and especially after getting to scare all of his friends he's almost as bad as I am. 

There are things that bother him, and I do my best to keep them put away. He doesn't like my Micheal Myers mask or my Dead Girl Animatronic, but other than that he laughs at adults that are scared of our other props/masks, etc....

I have halloween stuff all over year round so i'm sure that helps.


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## Hellvin (Jul 6, 2008)

I have a 9 yo and she is pretty comfortable with 99% of what goes up for Halloween but almost all of it is "no blood, no guts". Just the usual skulls, gargoyles, spiders, tombstones, etc.

When she was younger (4 - 7), we we definitely kept it non-gory. She also has her b-day close to Halloween, so we also have to be mindful that there will always be kids around that time of year - not just regular TOT's.

These days she is quite interested in helping her dad find props and helping her mom with decorations. She even spotted an RC tarantula for me the other day...

I think you have to allow the kids to take to the idea of Halloween on their own time - don't push them into it and allow them to get comfortable with what's up and going on. Eventually then, they want to get more involved ... or just roll their eyes when M+D get too crazy!


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## DeathTouch (Sep 6, 2005)

Man, now you got me worried. My girlfriend, who might be moving in with me when I buy the new house has a 4 year old and she scares easily. I am used to Teen-agers, and they don't scare easy in this day and time. Even with threats. LOL


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## sharpobject (May 7, 2008)

I agree with everyone else. Try and involve her as much as possible. As you're building something ask her if she thinks it's scary enough - should it be scarier? Betcha she'll want it scarier and maybe even give you ideas on what could make it scarier. It's all for fun - so have as much fun with it - with her - as you can. When my kids were little - I wasn't "haunting" - it was horror movies. And aside from the nudity stuff - they sat and watched them with me since before kindergarten. But I also made sure we watched the shows that explained how effects and makeup stuff were done. It never bothered them.


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## Night Owl (Feb 28, 2008)

Thanks for the words of encouragement... I feel better 

I agree with the concept of getting your kid in on the "behind the scenes" fun and fantasy of it all. That truly does seem to help. And like you guys, I have Halloween props and decorations stuffed in closets or strewn about my home office. Not to mention the kitchen cupboards. She's pretty used to seeing it year round, and gets a charge out of her friends running and shrieking from the hall closet lately. (Donna is residing there)

I do try to let her make the final decision on how scary things will get, and that led to some scaling back last year. I don't mind... she's the most important thing, and she knows it too!


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## slightlymad (May 25, 2006)

Our kids have grown up with Halloween and Horror movies and understand that it is all fake. However, despite all the building and such our youngest at 11 could not make it all the way through a pro haunt. Its not (in our case) so much what they see and get used to but how its utilized in the end.


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## Haunted Bayou (Feb 16, 2007)

I read somewhere that a kid was having a real hard time with haunted houses until they got him behind to scenes to scare people. Once he got to be the one to do the scaring he was cured and really got into it.


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## Night Owl (Feb 28, 2008)

Every kid is different, of course. When I was a young TOT, I was scared to death of the slightest hint of a yard haunt... and I LOVED it. My daughter likes it too, but I think Halloween is mostly just the holiday she has to put up with until Christmas. *sigh*


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## Spanky (Oct 8, 2007)

Last year my (now 8yr old) daughter would _sprint_ past my zombie prop I had out in the garage after Halloween when she took out the garbage. But she also loves to show her friends my storage area and scare them when she can. My 3 year old twins would walk past the giant spider on my workbench with their eyes locked on it, _just in case_. I think that if you don't force it on them, or use your props in a negative way, kids will adjust and become more comfortable when they see you are comfortable. Just don't be dismissive of their fears. "Don't be scared, its not real. Its only plastic" Yeah well, its scary friggn plastic. and you made it that way. Explain why and how and agree with them. They will process on the rest on their own.


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## Sickie Ickie (Jun 20, 2006)

I have a 3 and 1/2 year old that ask for scary stuff on the computer and scary games. He goes around the house drinking fruit punch and calling it blood, he asks to play in my make-up case and loves to watch the make-up and hf DVDs in the player. I don't think I've warped him at all! LOL

He does, however, seem to like things in pictures and video, and some of the same things scare him in person. My graveyard I have set on Halloween season, he'll see during the day and go out TOTing with my wife on Hallow's eve. I may not going into spooky sound FX until later when he's older, but until then- he loves playing with my skulls.


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## Revenant (Mar 17, 2007)

Spanky said:


> Just don't be dismissive of their fears. "Don't be scared, its not real. Its only plastic" Yeah well, its scary friggn plastic. and you made it that way. Explain why and how and agree with them. They will process on the rest on their own.


Thank you.


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## Aelwyn (Jul 7, 2008)

Frighteners Entertainment said:


> Tough call. I will be worrying about this as my boy gets older.
> Though, this is what i did to him as a newborn (born in Oct of last year)


Awwwwwwww!!!!!


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## Uruk-Hai (Nov 4, 2006)

Our daughter is slowly getting used to all the "spooky stuff". She's not crazy about getting too close to the werewolf and doesn't like a zombie head I'm working on so I try and keep them away from her. She can see them when she comes down to the basement to help with laundry and like Spanky says she keeps an eye on but isn't too scared. One thing that helps is that I leave out the photo album I've done up of Halloween past & present. She likes looking through "Daddy's spooky book" and I think it helps to normalize it for her. I also use it to prep her as to what's coming up this year with photos of new props in the works. I even put in an image of the new zombie mask I'll be wearing this year so she can get used to it a bit before the big night. The main thing is to let her take it all in at her pace and not rush it.


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## Denhaunt (Aug 18, 2006)

Spanky said:


> Just don't be dismissive of their fears. "Don't be scared, its not real. Its only plastic" Yeah well, its scary friggn plastic. and you made it that way. Explain why and how and agree with them. They will process on the rest on their own.


Amen my brother. It's funny how quickly they change at a young age. I wrote earlier (in this very same thread) that as long as she saw them as my toys she was okay with it. Well, appearantly something has "clicked" in her little mind that has warned her that these things are bad and should be avoided at all costs. I sat down with her and explained that they _really are _scary and that sometimes they even give me the shivers. I told her that that's part of the fun. I let her touch them and showed her the pieces of foam and jars of laytex. I showed her the paint and explained how it all came together to make something _designed_ to scare people. I can't say that she is "okay" with the basement. But at least we both agree that I won't be eaten when I climb down those creaky stairs. Who am I to argue with progress. I love the way kid's minds work!


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## Night Owl (Feb 28, 2008)

Since I started this thread, I overheard a lively conversation going on with my daughter and three or four of her friends from the neighborhood. My daughter was proud of the fact that SHE would have the scariest house on the street... the rest of them were wide eyed and full of questions, but obviously enjoying the anticipation of dressing up and coming here to get spooked. I have to say, it made me feel all warm and fuzzy! 

Anyway, the consensus on this forum seems to be that the absolute most important thing is that your kids understand the "why" and "how" we do this stuff, and the rest is just good judgement and discretion. Rules to haunt by.


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## Haunted Bayou (Feb 16, 2007)

Sounds like you have it figured out. Like you said...every kid is different. Some love it and some are scared that they will get scared. 

Me...I wasn't scared of halloween props but was terrified of the bloody bust of Jesus my aunt had on a table at the end of a dark hallway. I sprinted past that thing to get to my cousin's room where I slept when I stayed there. Every night I had to face the "bloody bust"...scarred for life now. LOL!


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## Terrormaster (Sep 27, 2007)

Night Owl said:


> Since I started this thread, I overheard a lively conversation going on with my daughter and three or four of her friends from the neighborhood. My daughter was proud of the fact that SHE would have the scariest house on the street... the rest of them were wide eyed and full of questions, but obviously enjoying the anticipation of dressing up and coming here to get spooked. I have to say, it made me feel all warm and fuzzy!
> 
> Anyway, the consensus on this forum seems to be that the absolute most important thing is that your kids understand the "why" and "how" we do this stuff, and the rest is just good judgement and discretion. Rules to haunt by.


Yup, thats the right frame of mind. My daughter is the same. She loves this stuff but gets spooked by some kid shows, go figure. Yet in the same breath she'll let me know what's scary and what's silly. And she's proud of how scary stuff is. Sometimes she tries to out scare me, putting sheets over her head and pretending to be a ghost, etc.

-TM


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## pixiescandles (Oct 18, 2007)

my youngest who is now 7yrs old...use to be afraid of everything halloween...even going into store and looking at props and such he was scared to death. I remember his pre-k year in school...our yard was deck out....waiting or the bus I would out there checking things out...straighten heads on props and he wouldnt come near any of it and I had to have a path that was free of everything.
I had to pick him up for the nurses office one day and she had this spider that would drop down from the door way when you walked through. Well I guess when he went in it was off and as we went to walk out it dropped...well OMG he freaked!!!!
She kept saying our sorry she was and said she thought with our yard...he was okay with halloween.
Anyways...that was 3-4 years ago. Since then I have had him be apart of everything I do...all props setting up...everything. He is more of a halloween freak them I am. Him and I love to look at all the sites and new things....so I'm with everyone else that says let kids help out....they see its not real and more then likely...they will be the future yard haunters!!


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## jackielantern (Aug 28, 2007)

Everyone has such good advise. I love the way Spanky acknowledges the childs fears and doesn't dismiss it. Excellent!

I don't have kids YET, but I have a couple of neighbor kids that were scared of our yard. So much so that I would have to walk to the sidewalk to give them their candy. Last year at the beginning of Oct. I invited Mom & kids to come down during the daylight anytime they saw us setting up. That way the kids got to see what the stuff was made of. Mom was very grateful and the kids loved seeing how the stuff was made. Maybe future haunters??? AND here's the best part........both boys walked up to our front door with their friends.   I was so proud. lol


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## RacerX45 (Apr 13, 2008)

I think that's the trick, let them see how it's made and what it's made of and it's no longer scary. Both my girls (5 1/2 and 4) love Halloween and love to watch me build my props. They even help out on some of the builds. My youngest has gone so far as using the giant spiders I have as toys and pretend friends (remind me about this when she's in therapy later in life  ). I explain to them that none of the stuff is real and it's all for fun. I try to stay away from the really gory stuff, but my graveyard is full of skeletons, ghosts and giant spiders. 

Randy


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## frstvamp1r (Nov 5, 2006)

I agree with everyone...let the kids be part of it...let them know its all fake and it cant hurt them. My upbringing was very very protective. No horror movies, even when I was a kid and my mom took me to Disneyland, we would ride the Haunted Mansion ride but she would "protect" me from certain things and she would cover my eyes. I later grew up to watch horror movies and LOVE the haunted mansion at first because it was taboo...now I cant get enough of either one, and my home haunt is the biggest and best in my neighborhood. My daughter (who is 16 months old) has no fear because she has not been taught to fear anything yet. I am not going to push her to like scary things, but I am not going to protect her of horror movies or haunts. they are just like roller-coasters, it's that adrenaline rush that makes it exciting. it's that quick "yipe" we do when someone jumps out at us and scares us that makes it fun. so yea..when she is older and I involve her with my halloween projects, if she isn't into it, then so be it, i won't force it on her. but all in all...get them involved, and if it's not their thing, then so be it.


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## BudMan (Mar 6, 2007)

Frighteners Entertainment said:


> Tough call. I will be worrying about this as my boy gets older.
> Though, this is what i did to him as a newborn (born in Oct of last year)


Cute little feller, Jeff. But what's with the baby prop?!


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## Night Owl (Feb 28, 2008)

My youngest has gone so far as using the giant spiders I have as toys and pretend friends (remind me about this when she's in therapy later in life  ). 
Randy[/QUOTE]

That makes me giggle... I immediately had a mental image of a your daughter and a table full of spiders having a tea party. Too cute!


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## RacerX45 (Apr 13, 2008)

She actually had one in her bed when she slept for quite awhile. I don't think even I would do that. They are about three feet wide and furry and would probably scare the heck out of me everytime I woke up. 

Randy


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## tonguesandwich (Oct 13, 2006)

My seven year old girl went to sleep every night with her favorite movie "The Mummy". She is now 15 and a high school cheerleader and all around good kid.....and loves to scare!


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## thegothicprincess (Jun 10, 2008)

I want to chime in here and say that I to have a 5 yr old, who has been helping me to decorate our 7 acre haunt. During the day, she is fine with everything, she does not like the stuff at night. 
She also isn't comfortable with props until she is fully aware that it is NOT for real. Takes a better part of an hour, for her to realize the fake head is not real, then she wants to run around to all the neighbors houses trying to scare them.

Don't push it upon them, let them help you to set, up and if something is truly frightening, then remove it until a later time.


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## Beth (Sep 27, 2005)

My kids have grown up with it. Even my niece. They walk through the barn while we are setting up and working on props- the whole works. However, when the lights go out and the people are dressed up they act like they're petrified!! Half of the time I think they do it to get their friends wound up!!! I figure they know that its' there so it's their choice!!


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## Papa Bones (Jul 27, 2005)

Anyone whos into woodworking as a hobby probably already knows about this site, but the Winfield Collection (www.thewinfieldcollection.com/catalog.aspx?catid=32&pg=1) has quite a few patterns and plans for Halloween yard art. Most of it is cutesy type stuff, but if you are worried about scaring kids too much or have a less scary part of your haunt for little kids, you might find something you like, and if your yard is scary you might be able to use some of the tombstone or gargoyle plans...


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